It all goes in the Potts

A few days ago on May 20, a young man died. This isn't unusual. Thousands of young men die every day. A large number die from cancer and other terminal diseases. But this particular young man has gained a lot of national attention due in part to his condition - osteosarcoma, but mainly due to his attitude towards life and death. Zach Sobiech was diagnosed with his cancer as a teenager. After failed treatment after failed treatment, he decided he wanted to live the rest of his life, however long that may be, with all the verve possible. He took to writing songs to his friends and family as his own way of saying goodbye. He was never likely to be a big star, but his songs are catchy and fairly well written.

A documentary was produced about him and released on YouTube just a couple weeks before his death, and has been making the rounds on social media for the past couple days. The vast majority of comments are supportive - offering condolences and prayers to his family, saying they love his music, asking who's been cutting onions, etc. But as with anything online that goes viral and has a comments section, there are detractors as well. Most of these comments can be shrugged off as coming from insensitive jerks who don't seem to realize that what they view on the internet is often a huge part of someone else's real life. There's a detachment from reality that some people have when they sit at a keyboard or watch something on the screen of their phone. A feeling of everything existing for their entertainment. That's sad, but a topic for another rant.

The one comment (now deleted) that really got to me was in response to another, more positive comment. Someone had said something about how brave Zach was. So this other person decided that was a perfect opportunity to go into a long, multi-post rant about his perception of bravery. The part that really caught my attention said "you don't have to be brave to die from a disease, you just have to die."

My initial thought was anger at the disrespect shown for a family who just lost their son, and disgust at the kind of human slime that would insult a dead kid who isn't even buried yet, but as I thought about the comment, I had to agree. It takes no bravery at all to die from something you can't control.

But Zach was brave. I've known quite a few people who have died from terminal illnesses. Some become bitter and angry at their situation. Some go on pretending nothing has changed. Some resolutely accept their fate and eventually just fade away. But some, a very small some, take those words from the doctors, the words that tell them they only have weeks or months to live, and turn them around to make the most of the time they have left. These people are brave. Not for staring down the corridor of death at their own mortality, but for determining that when they go, the world will be a better place because they lived. They love, they advocate, they raise awareness. They create. Through those actions, they inspire. They cause people to stop for a moment, and consider the value of their own life. They force the question: if I died tomorrow, would the world be better because I had lived?

There are two kinds of self improvement. The first is the kind you find shelves upon shelves of books about. How to lose weight, how to be more organized, how to be a better manager, how to be better at being you. This kind of self improvement, while there's nothing inherently wrong with it, is selfish. You want to improve because it benefits you in some way. The second kind of self improvement is the kind people like Zach inspire. The kind that says I don't want to be a better person because it will make my life better. I want to be a better person because it will make the lives of other people better. I want to use my energy to make this world a better place for everyone else. So no, Zach was not brave because he got cancer and died from it. Zach was brave because he dared to live his life in a way that made the whole world sit up and take notice. He lived what little was left of his life making sure that those around him were learning, loving, and growing. That is bravery.